emotions suppressed and expanded simultaneously. here it comes again .. the tears, the anger, the overwhelming crushing feeling. no reasons why, no triggers; just a sadness that takes over and leaves me no control. my body shakes, my throat is tight, my sobs are uncontrollable. my body is numb and the feeling takes over, nothing left to do but succumb.
with eyes closed and face moist with the tears that won’t stop falling, I think about the little humans that have saved my life more than once. they are the best of me, and I want to be the best for them.
so I take the blanket from over my face and use my sleeves to wipe the tears from cheeks. after I manage to catch my breath, I breathe in deep and let it out with relief. I can do this, I can fight this battle, one day at a time.
depression tried and failed today, I won this round.